Tuesday, July 12, 2005

At words poetic

What's with Bourque's unusually descriptive front page today? Embattled Conservative leader Stephen Harper is making a "surprise" visit to Gravenhurst and Huntsville on July 15th. Tory sources tell Bourque he's going with his hands wide open for defeated leadership candidate and designated federal standard-bearer Tony Clement, who is said to be trying to raise $250,000 for his campaign. It remains unclear what kind of media attention Harper will attract when he does a little mainstreeting in downtown Gravenhurst around 12:30pm (will Duff doff his seersucker for the occasion ?), before attending a secretive Clement "Investors Circle" schmoozer at a local bigwig's home where straw-hat'd supporters will fork over $3K for the opportunity to munch pickled gherkins, crunch rippled potato chips, gum polish cocktail weenies, slurp freshly-squeezed lemonade, listen to a local barbershop quartet, and bend Harper's ear. "Munch?" "Crunch?" "Slurp?" Onomatopoeize much? (And that's to say nothing of "the aptly-named Jester's Restaurant," or the nearly-Shakespearean modification of "straw-hatted.") Really, would it have hurt to have written this straight, rather than indulging in screwy banter? It's a distraction from the actual news: "Harper meeting with Clement and allies on BBQ circuit." Methinks someone needs to read up on the propriety of flowery prose in professional journalism...

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